Saturday, February 14, 2009

Happy Valentine's Day. What kind of card are you?


Ahhh, Valentine's Day. The one day a year when lover's are pressured into expressing that extra bit of love for each other by exchanging cards, presenting flowers, or offering high calorie confectioneries. If your loved one truly loves you, he will give you those high calorie confectioneries, because no matter how fat you think / complain you are, a gift of chocolates is a sign that he really, truly doesn't think you are in fact that fat. Because if he did he would've given you a yogurt, or maybe even a can of Slim Fast.

Upon selection of that most perfect card for my loved one, I am always reminded of our personalities. Of course if you aren't mushy gushy baby-talking couples, you won't exchange cards that express serious love and appreciation. If you are in a 'real' relationship, you always go right for the cards that are funny and cute, special and sweet, yet not overly sentimental or dirty. BTW what the hell is up with those dirty cards? It's CVS for crying out loud, children read those things too! Anyway, if I might, on accident, pick up a serious card, I usually wince and quickly put it back, as if the sentimental card had actually electrocuted me or something. For example, I picked up this card, that read:


"FOR THE MAN I LOVE".


So I'm thinking, okay, sounds promising, and maybe not to icky....so I opened it and read on.


"I love you because you listen, you help me through, and you make me laugh when times are tough. I love you because you're such a part of my favorite memories as well as my most important dreams. I love you because I can't imagine what life would be like without love... because I can't imagine what love would be like without you."


Okay, see now, that is SO not me. Or him. Or us. I figure if you don't SPEAK that way to each other, why send a card with such a sentiment. 'You make me laugh when times are tough'. Maybe, but sometimes you don't make me laugh when times are tough....times are tough usually because of something you said, or I said (but most def because of something YOU said) and therefore we are mad at each other so basically I want to tell you to F off, not get all icky and lovey dovey. Times can be tough, but I still love you, even though sometimes we think the other is the biggest asshole ever. Now THAT is a card I would buy.


Regardless of icky cards, I still love Valentine's Day. I chose a very funny and cute card for my man that expresses my love for him in a humorous, realistic way. It reads:

FOR THE MAN I LOVE

Love doesn't mind if you make lousy coffee. Love will still kiss you when you have the flu. Love moves the driver's seat back when you need it, reminds you to wear sunblock, cares if you do. Love may not have time for intimate dinners - you'll sometimes make do with a night of TV, but love will stand by you, defend you, remind you.....you're never alone in this world - You Have Me.


Perfect!! I always get on his back about sunblock!!! And I do love him, and he WILL always have me. : )


Happy Val's Day.


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